Monday, September 30, 2013

The Thing About Naysayers...

...they suck.

Often they shake your convictions and even your foundation.

I've met little opposition to the surrogacy journey. I knew at some point I would, and that didn't bother me. I'm usually not up for caring much about what other people think.

However, it stings when it is family.

While the details aren't necessary, it is important to share why harsh words can make such a little difference in this journey. Michael's mum has been overjoyed by the whole prospect of extending the family. She is incredibly excited to become a grand-mum. Michael shared these kind words she had for me this weekend:
I want to tell her how happy she has made my 2 boys and me. I want to say a big thank you to the whole family as it could not happen with out their help, so thank you all.
That, people, is the reason that hateful or insensitive insights don't matter.

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

The best thing...

The best thing about my surrogacy journey so far is that no one has asked me to step on a scale.

No one.

Not NEFI, not my local monitoring clinic, not my IPs and definitely, not my husband.

Clearly, that is not the best thing about the surrogacy journey, but it's a nice perk. I was expecting to be weighed, measured, poked and prodded. Basically, all of the prior stated is standard and routine EXCEPT weighing in.

I think that will end today. I see my personal OBGYN and I think the first order of business, besides paperwork, will be a weigh in.

I've got an idea of what my starting weight was... so we will see if there has been much of a change. If my feelings get hurt, there may be a stop for ice cream on my way back to work.

Thursday, September 19, 2013

Grow, Bunny, Grow!

Bunny is growing!

It is almost unfathomable to think about how much this little bebe has grown in two weeks. Let's not get ahead of ourselves, Bunny is only the size of a grape - but that looks like a big grape!

I came to a conclusion today. Almost an epiphany. It is hard to explain the relationship of a surrogate with her Intended Parents. Even harder to explain the relationship with the child.

With my own pregnancy, I wasn't overly "ga-ga" over the idea of our little bundle of joy. Maybe it was more terrifying that exciting. I didn't make much of a big deal out of my pregnancy. I didn't tell many people and my mother and Justin both had to beg for the go-ahead to spread the good news. I loved my baby in utero, but I didn't get in a good bond until he smiled at me.

I was thinking about how much Bunny had grown and how exciting that was. Of course, I always find myself sending pictures or video of the appointment while still in the parking lot.

The difference between loving your own child and loving a surrogate child is that when there is a milestone, you get so excited for the parents. You try to imagine which one will be the mother hen and which one will the spoiler. As creepy as it sounds, I find myself day dreaming of their future. I love seeing the excitement in their faces every time we Skype and I'm so thankful that we have been extremely successful thus far.

It is pretty rare that I think things are happening to me. I more often think things are happening to us - Michael, Jason and myself. More often, I refer to things as happening for them. This is their pregnancy. This is their baby. I'm just excited to be a small part of it. I think that is the main difference of being a surrogate mama.

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Moving along

Still nothing exciting on my end.

However, Michael and Jason are relaxing in France. I got an email this weekend stating that they were planning on "driving down."

Since I living in Kansas, I equate that with what would be a drive to Texas. That doesn't sound nearly as beautiful.

They are enjoying beautiful French countryside with sunflower fields. If I were to drive, I might be lucky to see a dead armadillo with a beer bottle propped in its puffy little hands. It just doesn't produce the same imagery.
Or this?

They checked in today with plans of visiting the village market. Apparently the weather there is beautiful with crisp night air; enough to need a fire. Meanwhile, back here in Kansas, I am expecting a high of 90 degrees. Never mind that two days ago it was 60 degrees and two days from now we will have a high of 70.

Their is a fair at the village market and the semi-celebrity, Chicken Man, will be there. He is renowned for the quality of his organic Bresse chickens. What a man! If Justin and I don't work out this is who I plan on running away with.

I doubt this is what chicken man really looks like, but I can dream, can't I?!?

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

8 Weeks

Uneventful is good.

This week I get to skip the doctor's office. All of my hormone levels and ultra sounds have been superb, so I get a break this week... at least from the doctor's office.

The due date for our little gummy bear is April 20, 2014, which just happens to be Easter. Baby shall from now on be referred to as, "Bunny."

I'm sure Bunny is growing like a champ in that baby tank. Am I starting to "show," you ask? NO! I'm a healthy woman... you'll have to wait a while for any noticeable bump to form.

Food aversions have mellowed as well as some of my nauseous tendencies. I seem to get really hungry, and then hardly eat any of my lunch. Considering I could be "losing my lunch," my appetite is hardly anything to complain about. Justin is already becoming worried about sympathy weight...

I set up my appointment with my own OBGYN (HIGHLY recommended by my new-mom neighbor). It's still a couple of weeks away, but I will consult with her before finishing my monitoring appointments. Jason and Michael are waiting on pins and needles for an ultrasound date, so they can make travel arrangements. Needless to say, that will be the first question I ask.

Thursday, September 5, 2013

Little Peanut

It's Thursday!

Don't worry - s/he'll get much cuter...
That means it was testing day!

The little peanut's heart beat is growing and getting stronger. I could actually see the little beat on the ultra sound screen. I also think I saw the start of little limb buds! 

The nurse practitioner (who is amazing, by the way) said that this week baby looks like a peanut, but next week, baby will resemble a gummy bear, which, of course, sounds delicious to me. 

Ironically, the two things stashed in my desk drawer happen to be peanut M&Ms and gummy bears...

Sunday, September 1, 2013

Meet the Parents

Due to technical difficulties with blogger, I have been asked to share this blog post from the intended parents. Hopefully this is just the first of many to come. Enjoy!


We have been keeping a low profile as really Morgan is the star here....but now that "we" are officially pregnant, we can't control our excitement as IPs any longer. So how did we get here... five years ago we took a career break and travelled the world for a year and half. We had time to reflect and time to plan for our future away from the pressures of work and the daily grind. On a garden square in New York we got engaged and on a beach in Koh Samui we decided to explore growing our family. 

Fast forward through the rest of our travels, setting up a new business, buying a new home and researching surrogate options, we eventually met up with Circle and started the process that brought us to the news of being officially pregnant yesterday.

Once we had filled in the interminable paperwork and sought to understand how the journey would proceed, we got to the great bits...matching with our wonderful egg donor and our amazing surrogate. The matching was intuitive and we felt an immediate connection between ourselves and the two wonderful women who have helped us get this far. Words can't really explain how lucky we feel to have meet and been accepted by them. It was a nervous wait to see if they were willing to help us and it still is difficult to express how generous they have been to make it possible to arrive at this point.

Seeing the ultrasound yesterday and hearing the heartbeat was astounding. It brought tears to our mother's eyes and the still photo has been safely lodged in our wallets. There's a long journey still to go...Morgan has morning sickness, raging hormones, tiredness and more pills to take...we have to wait till our lives get turned upside down. I know we have the best of that deal but despite being an ocean away we are with her all the way.

Michael and Jason